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Passion colors everything... (part I)

- Passion colors everything, you say. Then why are you running? What are you running from?
- From pain.
- Life is pain. No pain, no love and vice versa. You can’t really stop it. And this way you hurt yourself even more.
- Enough of this, you don’t know me at all!
- Don’t I, dear? Was it not me who caught you every time you fell? Was it not me who gave you whatever you needed without you even asking for it? Was it not?
- It’s not about that…
- What is it about then? Tell me, I’d love to know…
- It’s about self preservation.
- Damn you, it’s about you being scared of life! You’re not a teen anymore, dear, take a hold of yourself and open your eyes for the real world.
He walked away without saying a word. He left her there, on the top of the hill and went down without even turning back to see if she’s coming. Fireworks started. They were supposed to watch them together, smiling, their faces illuminated by the colourful little lights. But he was gone and she was there all alone. “Was he right? Is it really all about self preservation? If that night I hadn’t decided on that thing would I be hurting today?”
Tears rolled down her cheeks and she couldn’t stop them. He said many times that passion colors everything and now it was her passion for love that colored her tears black with pain.

He was making his way through the people, not paying any attention to the fireworks over the lake. He wanted to be away, to take off this mask of indifference he’d been wearing for such a long time and look at his real, passion colored face. Was he really scared of life?
Twenty minutes of fireworks. Twenty minutes of no one paying attention to the beautiful passion colored creature crying. Short applause and everybody went away. “I wonder if he sees in black and white. I wonder if someone like him ever sees in color.”

He was in the bathroom – same old full of color bathroom, but he was seeing black and white. He looked in the mirror and took off his mask. Here and there some color appeared on the walls, then everything became colourful.
- Passion colors everything, dear. It really does. Even with this mask of indifference it colors you with the colors of sky and rain and sun and love. I’m just scared to show it.
He was looking at the reflection in the mirror smiling at him and then it started talking.
- Do you actually believe yourself? Do you really believe that you can make passion color-blind? It’s just an illusion, this mask. She knows it is. YOU know it is. You cannot escape passion, no matter how much you run away from it. You may hurt her, but she will come back. You will be passion colored again.
- I can’t be, not in front of anyone else but me.
- Passion colors everything. It’ll color the mask of indifference very soon and you won’t have a choice, but to keep the colors and add new ones everyday. Passion colors everything.

"Passion... it lies in all of us... sleeping... waiting... and tough unwanted, unbidden... it will stir... open its jaws and howl...
It speaks to us... guides us... passion rules us all... and we obey. What other choice do we have?...
Passion is the source of our finest moments... the joy of love... the clarity of hatred... and the ecstasy of grief.
It hurts sometimes more than we can bear... if we could live without passion maybe we'd know some peace... but we will be hollow... empty rooms, shuttered and dank... without passion we would be truly dead..."

30.05.2008
Replica

To everyone out there who try to hide from love and passion. To two of my closest friends and maybe to a rock star.

In English

Comments

Anonymous said…
It's so beautiful Sil!! <3 Great job! =)
Ryan said…
This is wonderful, I was carried by a link on Alev's site and I found a wonderful story all wrapped up in the passionately decorated strands of incredible music. You're quite the writer.
Neeyla said…
Thank you very much, I'm really glad you like it. :) I'm working on the translation of all my writing and I hope they'll soon be available. ;) I would be glad to share them with you!

Thanks for commenting and I hope to be seeing you around in my english bloggy. :P
Ryan said…
you will :D

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